It's over.

Everything is over. Totally break up in the sense that I don't think we will be talking again for a very long period. I don't know whether I did the right thing but I just can't afford to take as if nothing happen, not to say I refuse to tolerate already, but I just cant take it. I felt so distracted from my studies. I can't read anything. I am very depressed. I know this is the time he needed most support from me, yet I am not understanding and chose to leave him.

What is left is only memories, even hatred from him, as I think he would most probably treat me as an enemy or whatsoever. Last few messages from him really hurt me deeply, but what he said was true, if really want to break up, is better we have no connection at all. Everything deleted from his mind, things from me will end up in the basket.

Haha..I asked for it, I get it, worst than what I ever thought. Not even friends, he chose it that way. NO matter how I wanted, at least we can be friends, that's my wish. Hopefully all unhappy things will end soon. I am tired of being sad..again and again..I know it's my own problem but I just cant help to stop myself from thinking. Anyhow, I promised myself, I will stand up again..I don't know what are my feelings now but I felt very weak, mentally and physically...my flu takes a part most probably...

I am thinking, maybe this will also be the last blog from me in this page, or perhaps not. Frankly speaking, this blog is created for him so that he has hint about how I really felt when things went wrong, to understand my feelings. As he won't be reading it again..it doesnt serve its main objective. If I can overcome my fear and blog here again, it will be a very a sign of me getting better, tougher, stronger.

Thanks Hong for giving me such a sweet memories, will stay in my mind for a long time...sincerely wish him all the best.